Anxiety

Hey guys,

Hope you have all had a good week. I received quite a few questions from my latest blog post - home sick about whether or not I suffer with anxiety as well so I thought what better way to answer your questions than to write it in a new post.

So the answer to the most asked question, do I suffer with anxiety? Yes I suffer with anxiety. Some days are good days and some are bad.

Do I suffer with panic attacks? Sometimes, I don't always have one whenever im feeling anxious but I have had  some, I normally have one when I am in a situation that I feel fearful in. For example, every single dentist trip I have had for the past 4 years I have without a doubt had a panic attack. Some people don't know what triggers their panic attacks so im glad I know how to deal with mine and when they are going to happen.

What makes me anxious? I am somebody who suffers from very low self confidence so when I am in a situation where I don't know anybody or having to go somewhere new that I don't know and have never been to before, I will start worrying and will start to feel very anxious, very quickly. For example, I booked a trip to Paris for Hayden's 18th birthday present and because I didn't know the area or where i was i became ill with worry and spent most of it in my room until Hayden could convince me that it was safe to go outside and that he had worked out all of our routes.

What helps me with my anxiety? I find that if I research into the place im visiting and can work out how to get home or to where im staying then im okay and to help with my social anxiety it is best for me to be with someone that knows me well enough to know that I have anxiety and will talk me through it all if I start to become to panicked or too anxious. If im alone and having to face a new place or a social situation then I try to take 5 minutes and remember why im doing what im doing.

How long have I had it? To be completely honest, I think I have always had it but just never knew what it was. I've never been a confident person and have a fear of meeting new people and going to new places but I think its probably been worse for me since I was 14. I moved away from everything and everyone I knew.

I hope this post helps some of you know a bit more about me and answered some of your questions.

Take care 

Megan x

Home sick

Hey guys,

Bit of a different post today, I just wanted to touch on a subject that I have always struggled with and am going through at the moment. Feeling homesick.

So as you all know I moved house around 3 weeks ago, we decided to take the plunge and move away from our families. Only about 30 minutes away but we are both very close to our families so it was a big decision for us to make. I've always struggled with being away from home ever since I was younger and I still struggle with it now, even if I am going on a holiday for two weeks by the second week I have to have made contact with my mum. I think its just a home comfort thing.

I'm not the most confident of people which is mainly down to my own anxiety issues and I find it really hard to make new friends and to socialise so I get lonely quite quickly. I haven't actually done much to make friends since i've moved here but I have met the neighbours who are so lovely and I am planning on taking Albie to some local toddler groups where hopefully I can give myself a kick up the butt and say hello to some new people.

With feeling homesick, I tend to start hating where I am very very quickly and that is not a good thing. About 2 weeks after we moved I in I felt so down in the dumps and just couldn't bring myself to go out in the village or anything, but  found it really helpful to talk to Hayden and my mum. Both of them know me better than I know myself and told me I would end up feeling like this and both have helped me feel so much more at ease with moving here. I've been out exploring with Hayden and Albie just so I can learn some places and how to get home, haha and my mum has become a regular visitor which I love!

My advice to any of you who suffer with feeling homesick is always try to talk to someone, don't feel it alone and bottle it up otherwise you just dig yourself a deeper hole and find it harder to get out of. There are so many different solutions to helping you overcome it and to make you feel more at home and if you talk to someone about it, you can work some out together.

I am slowly starting to feel more at home now and I couldn't of done it without support from my family and friends so I am so grateful to them for helping me try to overcome this and to settle in to my new home and area.

Do any of you suffer from homesickness or any other types of anxiety?
Let me know.

Take care
Megan x

How we first met

Hey guys,

So what with it being valentines day this Sunday, I thought I would do an extra little post for you all about how me and Hayden first met.

It all started in January 2010, my mum moved to Crawley, a small town in West Sussex and I decided to move with her. It took me six weeks to be accepted into a new school up here and half way through my exams it felt like forever. I finally started school on March 8th and I met Hayden in our geography class on the 15th March.

Some pictures of us when we first got together

I asked my friend who he was and then added him on Facebook, good old social networking. We started talking over MSN and went on some dates and officially started dating on the 3rd of April. So i had known Hayden just over two weeks and now look at us.

Hayden hasn't changed, he's always been so determined and always works so hard to achieve everything he puts his mind to. He has the funniest sense of humour and he never gets grumpy haha. I'm so grateful to be able to call him my husband and for him to be the father to my child.

I cant believe that almost 6 years on we have moved out, got married and have our beautiful little boy. I genuinely feel so lucky to be where i am and to live the life I do.

Some more recent photos of us

How did you meet your partner/husband/wife?
Let me know in the comments.

Take care
Megan x

Life update

Hey guys,

I'm so sorry I haven't uploaded a new post in a while, i've been so busy. If you couldn't tell from my last post, i've moved house.

What a stressful experience that was! I'm not the most organised person when it comes to writing things down on my calendar and ill only remember that I have a hospital appointment the day I am supposed to be there but with my house I am very organised. Everything has a set place and if its not there I start to freak out. I just like to feel stable and comfortable and living with all my stuff in boxes it takes me right of out my comfort zone.

Anyway, so yes i've moved house. We are nowhere near settled and it was stressful, the house needs so much work to the point, Hayden has been working 5 days a week at his job and then working all weekend decorating the house. We still haven't completely unpacked but its starting to feel a bit more like home now although me and Albie haven't stayed a full weekend here yet as we moved in on a Saturday and last weekend we stayed at my mums so we didn't get in the way of Hayden and his manly tools.

With all of this going on and caring for a child who has most definitely hit terrible twos and working, I have just been so exhausted by the time Albie is in bed that I have literally just been showering and going to bed at near enough the same time as him. But I have been planning some really exciting blog posts for the not so distant future and I cant wait for you guys to read them. I am trying to fully relax now that I feel I am finally getting some of my energy back, I promise there will be a new blog post every week!

Some of the exciting blog posts coming up are, a whole series of blog posts of before and afters of my new house and a special guest will be featuring on here very soon who I cant wait for you all to meet.

Hope this post has answered all your questions as to where i have been, it wont happen again.

Take care,
Megan x